This year I’m spending Christmas without snow and without cold. Instead, I am here, in La Serena, Chile. Yesterday I spent the day on the beach and went swimming in the Pacific Ocean. Now I am sun burned, quite sun burned actually. Definitely, this is an unusual way to spend the holidays.
For the first time in my life I am away from my family. Surprisingly this bothers me more than I thought it would. Deep inside of me I can feel a homesickness creeping around. I’m not the same person here, so far south of my home. I have changed and I’m not sure that I like the person I am becoming. There is a part of me that feels like Michigan would make everything feel right again. Really though, I think the changes inside of me started before I boarded that plane in Chicago four or so months ago.
Perhaps I’m not as intrepid as I thought I was. To me it is beginning to seem like I need more constant in my life than I use to think. This feeling is making me want to rush the present, but maybe the better thing to do is live in the right now. That is a hard thing for me when I’m constantly thinking about the future.
Today it is Christmas and I need to enjoy it, as lonely as it might be. I’ll eat my pasta, maybe read the nativity story from Luke, and possibly body surf in the waves of the ocean. We’ll see what happens. At this moment, I’m still in bed. There is no rushing the day.